Well that’s what we do, we fight… You tell me when I am being an arrogant son of a bitch and I tell you when you are a pain in the ass. Which you are, 99% of the time. I’m not afraid to hurt your feelings. You have like a 2 second rebound rate, then you’re back doing the next pain-in-the-ass thing.
So it’s not gonna be easy. It’s gonna be really hard. We’re gonna have to work at this every day, but I want to do that because I want you. I want all of you, for ever, you and me, every day.

Noah - the notebook

I’m writing the future,
I’m writing it out, loud.
We don’t talk about the past,
We don’t talk about the past now.

So, I’m writing the future,
I’m leaving a key here.
Something won’t always be missing,
You won’t always feel emptier.

Just think of the future,
And think of your dreams.
You’ll get away from here,
You’ll get away eventually.

So, just think of the future,
Think of a new life.
And don’t get lost in the memories,
Keep your eyes on a new prize.

futures - paramore

So I’ll try not to breathe as I hold my head still,
the light bends on my face, there’d be tears if I cried
and I’ll try not to think what the happy things were
I just think of the stuff that just made me shit scared
and I’ll just close my eyes and I’ll see everyone
that I’m leaving behind for the dawn of the sun
and I’ll try not to feel, yes I’ll try not to feel,
and I’ll try not to feel on the way down

Biffy Clyro - all the way down (via feelingless1991)
I can’t wait ‘til the August bank holiday weekend! Going to be weird being at Leeds and not Reading though :/ and not working it, actually being a punter and being able to see whatever I want and not be knackered from a night shift. I’ll miss the staff campsites though with our nice toilets and showers and boiling water point for coffee and pot noodles, and the ease of being allowed to take your own alcohol into the arena :(

I can’t wait ‘til the August bank holiday weekend! Going to be weird being at Leeds and not Reading though :/ and not working it, actually being a punter and being able to see whatever I want and not be knackered from a night shift. I’ll miss the staff campsites though with our nice toilets and showers and boiling water point for coffee and pot noodles, and the ease of being allowed to take your own alcohol into the arena :(

So I was feeling sad about the lack of adventure in my life and the thought that I’ll probably never get to realise my dream of travelling the world before I end up stuck in a dead end job with a house and a mortgage.
So I thought I’d have a look through my old memory box. So many memories of adventures in Canada, Florida, New York, Turkey, Music festivals and the like and then I stumbled on to this.
I completely forgot I had done this. I obviously wanted to keep the picture of my friend Claire looking beautiful but couldn’t bare to look at the person next to her.. so I stuck a picture over her face and drew a random person.

The person under that sticker is someone I feel that I will NEVER ever be able to forgive. They probably have no idea the extremities which their actions caused and to be honest, now I’d hope that after 6 years they’d feel disgusted in how they completely fucked someone up for the rest of their lives. I’d hope to think that they’d hate that someone had starved themselves because of them and in response to this struggled with their weight, image and self worth for their entire life since.
But then another part of me thinks how far I’ve come because of them. Right now I work with the most amazing kids in the world. I work in an adolescent mental health unit, full of kids who are struggling for a number of reasons, huge numbers of kids with eating disorders come through our doors, as well as those who have had a difficult past through family life or bullying or a range of other problems. I see so much of myself in so many of these kids, and I am so determined to help them, and I know that I do. Ever been told by someone that you are one of the reasons they feel that they’ve made progress and been told that your efforts have really helped someone? It’s the most amazing feeling in the world. I’ve work in a number of other areas of mental health too, all of which I’ve loved being a part of, but CAMHS has definitely stolen my heart.
6 years on I have a BSc( hons) and a Master’s degree in psychology and I am determined that one day I’ll get on that clinical training programme and I’ll be able to help people more than ever and, as the tattoo says on my arm “take the pieces and build them skywards” and use these shitty experiences which have come into my life since meeting what was such a vile human being and help to change the lives of others. Yes I still have my blips when it comes to eating and my depression and anxiety but I’ve accepted that this is me, and this does not need to define who I am. And although it doesn’t in a way I’m glad that she fucked my life up as I wouldn’t be where I am now, I wouldn’t be where I am helping these kids, my life probably wouldn’t have taken the same path, chances are I’d never have even met some of the amazing people who have in my life right now, who I can’t imagine life without. Who knows where I’d be but I wouldn’t be as determined to make things happen or to help others and I sure as hell wouldn’t be doing anything as worthwhile.
So a massive FUCK YOU, and Thank you to the girl under the sticker

Still, 
part of me really hopes you’re unsuccessful in life, cause I don’t feel you deserve anything else. Maybe I’m a bitch, but I just can’t help that, maybe I just believe in Karma.

So I was feeling sad about the lack of adventure in my life and the thought that I’ll probably never get to realise my dream of travelling the world before I end up stuck in a dead end job with a house and a mortgage.

So I thought I’d have a look through my old memory box. So many memories of adventures in Canada, Florida, New York, Turkey, Music festivals and the like and then I stumbled on to this.

I completely forgot I had done this. I obviously wanted to keep the picture of my friend Claire looking beautiful but couldn’t bare to look at the person next to her.. so I stuck a picture over her face and drew a random person.

The person under that sticker is someone I feel that I will NEVER ever be able to forgive. They probably have no idea the extremities which their actions caused and to be honest, now I’d hope that after 6 years they’d feel disgusted in how they completely fucked someone up for the rest of their lives. I’d hope to think that they’d hate that someone had starved themselves because of them and in response to this struggled with their weight, image and self worth for their entire life since.

But then another part of me thinks how far I’ve come because of them. Right now I work with the most amazing kids in the world. I work in an adolescent mental health unit, full of kids who are struggling for a number of reasons, huge numbers of kids with eating disorders come through our doors, as well as those who have had a difficult past through family life or bullying or a range of other problems. I see so much of myself in so many of these kids, and I am so determined to help them, and I know that I do. Ever been told by someone that you are one of the reasons they feel that they’ve made progress and been told that your efforts have really helped someone? It’s the most amazing feeling in the world. I’ve work in a number of other areas of mental health too, all of which I’ve loved being a part of, but CAMHS has definitely stolen my heart.

6 years on I have a BSc( hons) and a Master’s degree in psychology and I am determined that one day I’ll get on that clinical training programme and I’ll be able to help people more than ever and, as the tattoo says on my arm “take the pieces and build them skywards” and use these shitty experiences which have come into my life since meeting what was such a vile human being and help to change the lives of others. Yes I still have my blips when it comes to eating and my depression and anxiety but I’ve accepted that this is me, and this does not need to define who I am. And although it doesn’t in a way I’m glad that she fucked my life up as I wouldn’t be where I am now, I wouldn’t be where I am helping these kids, my life probably wouldn’t have taken the same path, chances are I’d never have even met some of the amazing people who have in my life right now, who I can’t imagine life without. Who knows where I’d be but I wouldn’t be as determined to make things happen or to help others and I sure as hell wouldn’t be doing anything as worthwhile.

So a massive FUCK YOU, and Thank you to the girl under the sticker

Still, 

part of me really hopes you’re unsuccessful in life, cause I don’t feel you deserve anything else. Maybe I’m a bitch, but I just can’t help that, maybe I just believe in Karma.

Because I’ve started falling apart, I’m not savouring life. I’ve forgotten how could it be to feel alive

Biffy Clyro “Machines”

(Source: godrown)

why do the majority of my real friends live so far away? I feel like a fucking social recluse.

:(

IT JINGLES. today has been a good day for purchases.

IT JINGLES. today has been a good day for purchases.

All stocked up for winter. Mmm….

All stocked up for winter. Mmm….

  • "Staff who work with smokers are also affected. Nurses reporting regular exposure to passive smoking at work have been found to have a 92% greater risk of subsequent coronary heart disease (Kawachi et al. 1997)."

way to scare me NHS e-training. I’m forced to go sit outside with smokers most days. Bit unfair really…